WTF is Somatic Sexology? (and why you should care)
Originally published on my Substack: Sex & Somatics with Mandy Rose, where I explore the sweet spot between language, sensation and soul.
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Hello beauties,
so today I want to get my sex geek on and so we're going to talk about what the 🦆 is somatic sexology and why should you care.
When people ask me what I do I say I'm a Somatic Sexologist and a Tantric massage practitioner and the most common response I get… is a blank stare 😶, and maybe a stuttered “What even is that?!”
And that's a fair question. This field is relatively new (it's only a couple of decades old), it's not something that we're taught about at school or anywhere else, and you won't stumble across it in the mainstream media.
Although,
Netflix did air Gwyneth Paltrow's Sex Love and Goop series a few years back, and when that happened I got so excited to see my profession being aired to the masses.
And so let's break it down.
soma means of the body
somatic work is learning through the body not just about the body
sexology is the study of sex pleasure and intimacy
So altogether Somatic Sexology is the art and science of helping people understand and rewire their sexual and pleasure experiences by working directly with their bodies.
This work isn't about fixing you, and I'm not here to give you tips tricks or the latest textbook sex positions. jeez try saying that a few times fast.
I'm here to help you understand your own nervous system and how it protects itself, and how it opens, or doesn't, and why.
It's about learning those micro skills that your body was never taught like
how do I feel pleasure?
how to stay present when things feel vulnerable?
how to rewire old beliefs, that live in your muscles and your skin, and not just in your mind?
And so here's something else that I'd like to name clearly.
There are a lot of sex coaches out there,
Many of them work with talk based methods and more are beginning to include somatic work, and that is great.
But what I do goes another layer deeper.
I'm a certified sexological body worker, which means that I'm trained to include erotic and genital touch as part of the learning process, when informed and consented to by everyone involved.
So why does this matter?
Because we don't talk our way to feeling sexually confident.
Sometimes you need to actually feel what it's like to be
touched without performance
to be witnessed in your erotic expression without criticism
to unlearn shame through sensation, not just explanation
And that is the power of Somatic Sexology. It's not just about understanding pleasure as a mental concept, it's about reclaiming it with your whole body.
You can think about it like learning to drive. You don't just read the manual, and get it. You need to feel it in your body.
At first the brakes, the accelerator signals mirrors and the traffic can all feel clunky and overwhelming. But with repetition, your body starts to coordinate until it gets to a point where it becomes natural, it becomes instinctual.
Sex and pleasure are no different.
And Somatic Sexology invites you back into the relationship with your own body and sexuality. Where pleasure isn't something you achieve, but something you build a capacity to hold.
And if no one ever taught you to do that, that's okay. That is not your fault. But it is something you can learn and reclaim.
If you want to know what this actually looks like behind the scenes, I'll take you into the room with me in this week's paid post. Where we break down the flow and real moments inside a session.
Thanks so much beauties, I'll see you next week.
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